She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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