Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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