I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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