I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
As shirtless as possible
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
there is glitter all over my balls
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