hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
