She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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