I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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