so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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