i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
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