You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
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