what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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