giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Randomize
