I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
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