My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Randomize
