Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
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