there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
