its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
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