that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
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