i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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