Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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