everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
