what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
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