Porn is love you can see.
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
