Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
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