I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
