Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(818): View more from California

Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off

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(703): View more from Virginia

he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day

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(619): View more from California

You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.

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(612): View more from Minnesota

Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat

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(416): View more from Toronto

Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.

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(416): View more from Toronto

I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks

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(307): View more from Wyoming

The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.

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