i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize