Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
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