Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
