And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
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