Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Randomize
