I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
