i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
