I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
