I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
