I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Randomize
