you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Randomize