i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
We need to rekindle our bromance
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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