I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
