We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
