i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
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