how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Randomize
