i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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