Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Randomize