Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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