How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
