I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
