But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
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