you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Randomize
