She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
